VermilionOne
03-19-2006, 01:21 PM
Hey all!
This is from a series of short essays written by a person currently working in Japan as an English teacher. It gets pretty profane, so I can't give out the website, but it's pretty funny. Here's a Naruto themed selection I thought you all might enjoy.
I don't know why, but I woke up one morning and my left eye was pretty irritated. It was all red and slightly swollen. ...I went to work. What's the alternative, go to a Japanese doctor who'll tell me I need to take some suppositories to get the swelling to go down? Or that the eye is a lost cause and here's my new wooden one? **** that, I'm going to work.
The irritation and swelling didn't really subside though, and I spent most of the day doing my best Sagat from Street Fighter impersonation (for those of you who are Street Fighter impaired, it means I had one eye closed most of the time). This went, for the most part, unnoticed. ...I love how completely un-observant Japanese people are. Anyway, I was in a ninensei class, when someone finally noticed I was only doing class with one open eye. The worst ninensei boy. The boy who wrote the "I Can Only Love You For a Day" break-up letter, and helped to pioneer the Waist-Shake movement.
He points it out in the middle of class, and I say that yes, my eye hurts so I have it closed at the moment. "He's Kakashi-sensei!" The boy blurts out. "He's got a Sharingan in there! He must have used it too much, so now he has to rest it."
This boy is referring to some ninja anime called Naruto.
Class went on, but now the boy is completely enthralled by me. It's a good day if we can get him to stop punching people for 10 minutes, but this time he was hanging off my every word, waiting to see if I'd pop out a ninja-eye that could sense his power-level, or send him to a space/time void where I could kancho him limitlessly for 24 straight hours while only 3 seconds passed in the real world. He even quieted the other kids who were starting to get noisy. "Hey, shut up! I'm trying to listen to Kakashi-sensei!" He'd say.
Well, now I know that if I want to get the bad kids to settle down, all I need to do is show up to school looking like a Konoha Ninja. ...Yeah, I think I'm just gonna let them stay stupid, thanks.
This is from a series of short essays written by a person currently working in Japan as an English teacher. It gets pretty profane, so I can't give out the website, but it's pretty funny. Here's a Naruto themed selection I thought you all might enjoy.
I don't know why, but I woke up one morning and my left eye was pretty irritated. It was all red and slightly swollen. ...I went to work. What's the alternative, go to a Japanese doctor who'll tell me I need to take some suppositories to get the swelling to go down? Or that the eye is a lost cause and here's my new wooden one? **** that, I'm going to work.
The irritation and swelling didn't really subside though, and I spent most of the day doing my best Sagat from Street Fighter impersonation (for those of you who are Street Fighter impaired, it means I had one eye closed most of the time). This went, for the most part, unnoticed. ...I love how completely un-observant Japanese people are. Anyway, I was in a ninensei class, when someone finally noticed I was only doing class with one open eye. The worst ninensei boy. The boy who wrote the "I Can Only Love You For a Day" break-up letter, and helped to pioneer the Waist-Shake movement.
He points it out in the middle of class, and I say that yes, my eye hurts so I have it closed at the moment. "He's Kakashi-sensei!" The boy blurts out. "He's got a Sharingan in there! He must have used it too much, so now he has to rest it."
This boy is referring to some ninja anime called Naruto.
Class went on, but now the boy is completely enthralled by me. It's a good day if we can get him to stop punching people for 10 minutes, but this time he was hanging off my every word, waiting to see if I'd pop out a ninja-eye that could sense his power-level, or send him to a space/time void where I could kancho him limitlessly for 24 straight hours while only 3 seconds passed in the real world. He even quieted the other kids who were starting to get noisy. "Hey, shut up! I'm trying to listen to Kakashi-sensei!" He'd say.
Well, now I know that if I want to get the bad kids to settle down, all I need to do is show up to school looking like a Konoha Ninja. ...Yeah, I think I'm just gonna let them stay stupid, thanks.